Monday, April 11, 2011

stuff that annoys me this week:

go blunt or go home, that's what i always say. i also say that the most important thing one should do each day at work is take care grooming one's desk flare. what's that? you don't have desk flare? well then it's time you started evaluating what it is by way of trinkets, tchotchkes and even cutouts from magazines that makes you happy, that stirs your mind and adds sugar to your creative juices. yes i'm talking about the mess of knick knacks and paintings, clipped quotes and fortune cookie fortunes so yellowed with age, the restaurant has since relocated three times. desk flare is essential to one's well-being at work. it's keeping what inspires the very essence of you all around, and watching each piece dance around in a mentally-construed choreography that brightens up the dullest of afternoons. no one understands the importance of desk flare as much as the very global proprietors of kitsch, none other than etsy, bestowing upon each new employee $200 to buy any variety of merchandise hawked on the .com flea market they think would make suitable desk flare. anything.
that makes me happy. as does my collection of desk flare, and the liberties that allow me to maintain my cubicle gallery that today welcomed two sanskit inscriptions of om mani padme hum.

but you know what doesn't make me happy? many things in this world.

like nicki minaj. i've been ready to tear into this one for some time, and now my pink-hued moment of glory has arrived.

what, THE fuck, is so SURPRISING, nicki minaj, that you always have to wear a look of such profound amazement on your face? it can't be that pink hair because we've seen the 7,894,327 ways you can wear pink hair. you ain't nothing spektakalar, girlfriend. i don't even know what you sing, and because the sight of your face is instantly so repulsive, i am thus repulsed to give your music a go. so shut up because i'm running out of snarky things to say about you.

and the kardashians. speaking of uni-face, that kim kardashian always makes the same, exact, "i-point-my-face-down-yet-look-you-straight-in-the-eye-because-i-learned-from-my-bff-since-we-were-like-six-paris-hilton-that-it-makes-your-nose-look-smaller."

umm, why do we care, again, what kim kardashian's nose looks like? why do we care about kim kardashian? and why does their family have like 6 shows on every channel? i saw today that the tranny one (and i can call her that because she said so in her cosmo article) has ANOTHER show with her husband. am i odd man out because i just don't care about these girls with all the misspelled names?

ok i'm done venting negativity.
'till next time.

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