Friday, April 17, 2009

revolutionary rogue

repetition hurts my teeth...



so i'd like to use this third friday of the month to tip my hat to change; to exercise my right and rule to change, or at least to contemplate it.
as much as i've hailed the welcome of change in my life, recent consideration has duly enlightened me to the fact that i actually fear it. change is when the current conditions to which we've become accustomed take a turn toward something different. sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. sometimes up, sometimes down. sometimes top, sometimes bottom (i had to). but basically, it's a shift that affects us in both subtle and profound ways. change can be gradual, and it can be rapid. it can be voluntary, as well as involuntary, just, as well as terribly unjust. but when change has the power of will behind it, and [usually] a positive goal in mind, it becomes revolution. a conscious effort to alter the way things are as a way of improving them for those they directly and indirectly affect.
ok, i'm done being webster. this has a point, i promise. i'd like to discuss the above image: that, my pals and confidantes, is a fritaco. it's what happens when a bag of fritos is spiked with grade C beef, shredded iceberg lettuce and government-supplied cheese. it's also what happens when you attend a marginally-scholastic public school that includes a "taco line" as one of its lunch options (the other two obviously being the 'hoagie' line [the mere phoenetic sound of the word falling beyond my capabilities] and the pasta line). and in this taco line, one could find a breed of taco that even today stuns those to whom i relate it. it was a bag of fritos...good, ol' fried corn fritos, curved nuggets of golden crunchiness, stuffed with aforementioned grade C beef, shredded iceberg lettuce and topped with a lovely carotene and white blend of shredded government-supplied cheese. this was lunch. the same school that preached against allowing junk food to encroach upon the food groups was serving it in their very cafeteria.
this, in my opinion, was wyoming valley west's way of being audaciously revolutionary. instead of just spending pennies more and importing mass amounts of old el paso taco ingredients, they fortified snack-sized bags of one of the ultimate in home movie snacking with a few extra tidbits and called it a taco (or fritaco, as i like to remember it). that's revolution.



like many of you, i've, of late, gotten completely sick of hearing about how bad the economy is, how bad it's getting, and how bad it was eighty years ago. i think the reason the economy has maintained such a shiteous condition is simply because change hasn't been instituted.
so prez obama's all about his stimulus initiatives, which i'm sure are all terrific ideas, and will inevitably work, but maybe the real cause, or what's suspending the recovery, is just beyond his view.
how, exactly, are we aware of the economy's current condition? from where do we get our information, both stagnant and updated? from the media, that's where--the television news, newspapers, internet, podcasts, the radio, fucking twitter, for goodness' sake. but it all trickles down through the media. what is this media? is there a group of five people who meet in a chrome-lined, fluorescently-lit room in comfy leather swivel chairs around an elliptical table that refer to themselves as "the media" and generates all sorts of concepts for the world to believe? because i'm beginning to think so.
think what would happen if, for one day, things were to flow in the other direction, economically. if the media were to report that the economy, the ridiculously ubiquitous word that's taken the blame for just about everything nowadays, was actually doing wonderfully. if brenda blackmon and sue simmons blinked their indigo-lined eyes in front of the camera and flapped their frosty lips and told us that "yes, we HAVE recovered from this economic crisis! everything has miraculously lifted, and we can all get jobs and spend money like normal now." obviously, all of america would listen because they're all fat, stupid fritaco-eating zombies who believe everything that comes out of their flat screen tv. the only criticism would come from the intellectually elite, i.e. rachel maddow, keith olberman and suze orman (basically my week's worth of DVR'd shows), and by the time their opinions aired, much action would have taken place. people would spend, probably not too much because even though we're a stupid people, we'd still be precarious at first, but they'd drop a few dollars here and there (not on credit, of course). money would go from wallets to economy. economy would go from sad to happy. parched job reservoirs would refill, and life would, much more rapidly if my thoughts and subject are to be believed, resume normalcy as it was before the big crash.
just think--could one day of progressive spending revolutionize the current economic status?



and by far, my favorite. these signs always kill me. it's like the restaurant's way of boosting conscientious activity. like saying, "we know you have an option when cleaning up after urination and defecation, but we just want to let you know that our employees don't. they must warsh their hands after every usage of this bathroom."
well what the fuck about the rest of the users of the same bathroom? disgusting pigs that they are. i think the restaurants should start using a little ball-power and posting signs that read, "everybody is required to wash their hands after doing whatever it is they're doing in this bathroom. thanks."
so i've taken it upon myself to generate stickers that read "everybody" and i'm going to conveniently re-word each and every employee-hygiene sign i encounter.
how's that for revolutionary?

make it a great weekend, kids.
loves ya.
xo
b.a.

1 comment:

J Catlow-Shea said...

you, my dear, are a one man silk tornado revolution...

baci