Monday, December 25, 2006

diaz day


i wish today were cameron diaz's real birthday. it's actually august 30th, but i don't know that because i'm some obsessed fan--i just imdb'd it. and i'm not just saying all this because it's Christmas eve, either.
i just need to say that cameron diaz is really amazing. i feel that she's the only celeb (and by celeb, i'm simply referring to the term cam has been such with by society, as well as us weekly) who's the real deal. i have a feeling i'm going to be repeating that term quite frequently throughout my little 'festo.
but i digress.
i think she's my favorite well-known person. there, that's better. she's the only one who seems really real--ya know what i mean? she doesn't stick her ass in every camera lens that comes her way, a la paris, and i think she's one of the few great actresses that actually still consider their trade a job. cameron wakes up, makes a movie, eats dinner, and goes to bed. she's normal.
but more than that, she's cool. i really think we're destined to be great friends. one day i'm going to meet her at some function, and something really cliche is going to happen. i'll trip over her leg or something. and she'll say, "oh, i'm sorry!" and notice a certain accessory i'll no doubt be wearing--like suspenders--and say, "great suspenders, though!" or maybe she'll take note of my daring rat tail. "is that rat tail?" she'll inquire, to which i'll gleefully respond, "it sure is! let's have a drink and toast to rat tails!" and she'll say, "it's on!"
and from that point cam and i will be awesome friends. she'll come over and we'll do facials and watch my golden girls dvds.
but let's talk about her more. she's the real deal. and she's got such great style that i honestly feel is inherent. i wouldn't at all be surprised to find out she doesn't have a stylist. i feel like she has her own eye for incredible fashion, and poo pooh's the idea of allowing someone else's ideals to eclipse her own unique perspectives. have you ever seen cameron diaz on a worst-dressed list? and if so, it was probably because the stupid magazine running it ran out of space on the best-dressed list. like, if she decided to wear a black number with netting and some underlying crinoline that, no doubt, looked incred, they'd condemn her for trying to be goth or something. it's like, "hello people--she's cameron diaz. she knows what she's doing. and black looks good on everybody, so go to your macy*s sale and shut up."

i also think she'd be really fun to go discount shopping with. making an entire day of random stops to marshall's, tj maxx, etc. and raid the home sections for odd vases, knick-knacks and discontinued flatware with holiday handles. we could host odd little dinner parties and invite people we've always wanted to know, like catherine zeta jones (another real deal) and miuccia prada.

and even though this little manifesto sort of makes me borderline weirdo, i think if cam were to read it, she'd say, "this kid is the real deal too. let's totes get togeth!" and when we go out, she'd be totally crazy--but the good kind of crazy. like the kind that gets sloshed (because you can tell she's a funny drunk--like moi) really early in the night so by the time you get home, you're all better and you can wake up at 11 and meet for brunch and spend the day reading magazines and shopping for fun body exfoliants. maybe she'd even join me on my crusade for the homeless!

but anywho--today is cameron diaz day, but instead of going out to buy some rotten tabloid and read about her that way, don a blond wig, go out on the town, and party like the real cameron!

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